The Lord looked doon on Noah,
Said “Turn ilkie stick an stane,
An capture ivery kind o' beast
Afore it sterts tae rain.”

They nippit up the gang plank,
 Strippit, spottit, black, an broon,
Syne Noah hystit anchor,
Till the water dwinilt doon.

The Human race diversifeed —
Nae wan o' them's the same,
They're a niver endin story
That ye've aye tae learn again.

Ye think ye ken them?
Deil the bit!
Ye've anely scratched the tap,
There's aye the ither layer
Aneth the currant on the bap.

Neist time the Lord grows wrathfu, Noah,
Dinna be a gowk,
Tak ae boatie fur the animals,
Anither fur the fowk.